I am not too sure where I last left you off, but let me tell you where I am now. I have been exploring myself, changing my belief systems, and expanding my consconciousness consciously for two years now, and it's funny how I totally forget that in order to release you have to follow a very much step by step process... I still try to skip steps, probably because i can see where the wave is taking me and I want to get there, but I must follow the process. Changing human DNA through positive thinking, rerouting our karmic spirals and letting the love in is a magic, a science, a solution to our problems. Doing the work means following your cycles, paying attention to your feelings, assessing yourself and why you feel that way. Becoming my own therapist has been the greatest healing modality for me, especially when nobody is available at that moment.... Literally just walking up to that emotion and saying "hey dude, why do you feel this way? What is it that you're not getting?" And usually the answer has something to do with not feeling loved, and being afraid to accept love because it was the people who loved me that hurt me... When I can stay objective to how i feel that's when I can get the work done. I have all these feelings towards old friends, old lovers, anybody who came in my life before I had iris, basically I have some attachment to some pain that I felt, and as much as I wish the pain would just go away, it doesn't. It stays until I fully let it express itself, until I let it grieve what it thought it had lost, or hadn't received, until I show compassion for myself, until I just let it all out, that is when I feel peace. It's like I am walking through all the dark parts of myself, while shining the light on it, and the light makes the darkness feel seen, which allows an open communication between self and ego. Ego has to express why it feels it can't do its job, and spirit shows ego that what was believed before is no longer true and can be let go of. When that happens I either feel an intense release or I cry it the fuck out. And when I cry I sob as loud as possible and when I do that I feel the love of god/ess fill me up and bring me closer to it. This shadow work that I do is probably the most important thing I am doing; by changing my belief system, balancing my chakras, and letting my authentic self shine, I am changing everything around me. It's not about "who did this to us" as a human family we ALL have to take responsibility for the whole of negativity we fell into, we chose this, all great religions say that. Eve chose to ate the apple by choice.... God did not force her. We wanted this experience, and now we can go back.... We can be gods children through our actions not just through our words. Raise vibrations, experience love, it's needed.
Until Next Time,
Olivia 
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