Saturday, April 27, 2013

Boundaries, do I have any?

Being such a free spirit, I am so confused on the concept of boundaries.
Here's the thing, I can always see where people are actually coming from when they do things that may "effect" me emotionally, and "cross" something that hasn't been crossed before. I think about God and I think about how God has no boundaries, and based on all the definitions we put on God, we GAVE it boundaries. God is spirit, spirit can do whatever it wants, spirit has no boundaries, spirit is free. When we come down here, Death becomes a reality, and people play into that fear of death. What they didn't tell any of us (as still some of you who read this may not believe me, and are too caught in the logistics of it all) is that DEATH IS NOT FUCKING REAL. Spirit is eternal. We all have a spirit, therefore we never die. Our consciousness (Universe) is forever just as much as our body (Mother Earth) is. Until our spirit decides to split off and do something else, which is highly unlikely any time soon, we're all going to be just fine. So I come back to boundaries. If we eliminate the fear of death, as I have told myself many times before, then what would we need boundaries for? Boundaries come from wanting safety within your home, within your body. Wanting to feel comfortable, wanting to feel joy, ease, and basically no discomfort at all. Our human way of fixing this "problem" of wanting to feel safe? Boundaries. Don't do this because it will lead to this, and it will cause this, and this and this and this and this. Alright, you basically just predicted your future because you created all of that happening in a certain way IF your boundaries would be crossed. Is more at stake when you begin to acquire things (i.e. a car, a home and all the THINGS that come within the home, and the responsibility of maintaining the home), is there a need for boundaries when you begin to raise children...
I can come to this point, yet I can go either way. I'm at a crossroads within myself. Do I create boundaries, or do I allow my true essence to guide me and I know that I'm going to have all the time and space I need to do all the creative expressions I want to do in THIS body, and if I choose, I can live forever (because I am spirit, and spirit is God), IN THIS BODY if I choose. It's all choices. Each person has their own way of learning, and each person has their own journey. Some create many many many many MANY boundaries, while others only have a few... I can create mine right now.... and as I sat there for a second, I couldn't.
I was raised in a home with absolutely no boundaries, and ALL THE TIME my body boundaries got crossed when my mom would hit me... in fact I felt as though I was never allowed to have boundaries for myself because I was too busy trying to respect others' boundaries, and I never had time for my own. So I became free, I created a place with no boundaries.
If having boundaries is knowing when to get the fuck out and when to stay, then I guess you could say I have a boundary for that, and that defines me safety. I know what's good and I know what's bad, because I guess I do have to face the fact that I live in a world of duality, attempting to bring the oneness through the backdoor to save me from the sufferings of birth and death.
I put a lot of boundaries on the lover that I want, and those boundaries actually got me in a lot of "trouble" based on my last relationship. How can you be honest with someone, when they're not even being honest with themselves? The monster of duality is haunting our relationships, is creating a struggle, a contrast, a push and pull between our brothers and sisters, and we are not living as harmoniously as we could be. God is all of us. God is one. Our spirits all come from the same place, but down here because we are all in separate bodies, we seem to believe we are all separate entities, and I am even guilty of separating myself from my brothers and sisters in life. I want to take all the good and say "yep that's a part of me too" and I want to let go of all the bad, recognizing it as something that is not mine... but the fucked up reality of it all is that, the good and bad came from the same fucking place... and that place was God, and spirit created this duality to learn something about itself... to learn what it could do? To learn how much it could ACTUALLY create? Spirit didn't realize by splitting into two, that Matter would turn into Anti-matter, maybe? No, of course God realized it was doing... and that's where the emotions come in. The mystery of life. Boundaries, safety, security. Keeping God close. Knowing that GOd is always there, and never left us anyway. Whatever I do, I am safe. Wherever I go, my true essence is guiding me. The only boundary I have is to be aware, be conscious, be open and receptive to new ideas and new perspectives, create ALWAYS out of love, be honest with myself, let go of what is no longer needed, and be free.

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