Monday, March 11, 2013

The Journey to Love

I started writing a third person male perspective of what I thought love might be, but I quickly came to realize that I cannot write that, because I am a woman.

So here I am, and I'm calling to the cosmos and I'm asking them what love is. I have had the same concept/thought form of what love is since I was ten years old (I would like to thank MTV's Real World cast of Las Vegas for teaching me) and now that I'm 22 I am starting to see that my life in 3D is not what I thought it would be, and my idea of love is unhealthy, outdated, and plan right annoying now. I have restarted my sexuality; and by going back to square one the healing process begins. I know what can take me to the esctay that I want to feel from love, and I'm starting to gain better grasp.

Feeling the body. Soft. Pure. Smooth. I want to feel more. I know I can. The waves are so intense. The emotions are boiling over; the pasta has been cooking too long. I can't help but wonder if I'm just watching, or if something inside of me is actually going on. None of what I feel makes sense, my words are jumbled because I do not want to comprehend the emotions; the creative ablity. Nothing about my emotions is sexy. I am filled with anger, sorrow, pain, guilt, remorse, and down right saddness. I know that if I can get through the saddness and the anger I will find the love I am looking for. Until then bloggettes, I'll be checking out. I'll be back when I can produce something amazing. Until Next Time, -Olivia

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